Growing old was never a goal, but just the same, I never realized that one went nutters upon reaching a certain age! OMG, most days I can barely stay in my building listening to the constant whine about illness, neighbors, heat or cold, etc. I think most "old farts" are happiest when they can bitch about something. I know that applied to my mother and in-laws. Recent radio ads talk about aggression being a sign of Alzheimer's disease...most old men must have it then cause they always start fights and arguments, or are belligerent drunks! The old batty women just cry "My pussy hurts".....a saying a friend in Colorado made up, that's fitting!
So I escape on the Trolley or go to the Senior Center, or library. So far, so good!
"Invite your enemies to dine on a cup of malice and a cold plate of revenge!"
Thursday, July 30, 2009
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
Today I Had Outpatient Surgery
Today, the hottest day in Portland's history, I just finished outpatient surgery. Had a "precancerous" mole and the third "precancerous" irregularity froze off my ear. No pain yet, that numbing stuff works great. Grossed myself out by picking up the mole swimming in a sample jar for analysis...do you know where your DNA has been? The incision was cauterized, but is still bleeding like a stuck pig....I've got band aids! Blood Pressure 120/80, weight a disgusting 203 on my bony 6' 2" frame. I'm good for another five years or 2012, what ever comes first.
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
When it's Hotter Than Hell!
Here in the Pacific NW, it's 103F yesterday and 105F today, through Thursday..then a "cool down" to the mid 90's F. An "Heat Advisory" has been issued for the poor, elderly, and most normal folks with out AC to go to a cooling center! Last night at 10:00 PM, it was still 90F. It hasn't rained for over a month.
PDX (Portland) is famous for providing low cost housing. One of the items they left out was AC. Sundays newspaper ad had several (Chinese made) window room Air Conditioners...studio apartments are less than 300 square feet...on sale for $100. In my building which cost multiple millions to build 15 years ago, that would cost $12,000 or less in bulk today. Residents pay their own electric, so original installation would be minimal. AC would be a better investment than a fancy patio, or a gas fireplace in the sitting room.
Who is in charge to make these decisions, ones that require little but common sense?
When it's hotter than hell, AC is not a luxury, but rather a necessity!
PDX (Portland) is famous for providing low cost housing. One of the items they left out was AC. Sundays newspaper ad had several (Chinese made) window room Air Conditioners...studio apartments are less than 300 square feet...on sale for $100. In my building which cost multiple millions to build 15 years ago, that would cost $12,000 or less in bulk today. Residents pay their own electric, so original installation would be minimal. AC would be a better investment than a fancy patio, or a gas fireplace in the sitting room.
Who is in charge to make these decisions, ones that require little but common sense?
When it's hotter than hell, AC is not a luxury, but rather a necessity!
Monday, July 27, 2009
Talking to God......He answers!
Here is where my "fans" separate the wheat from the chaff (me). I normally don't talk to God, even though I believe in God. I used to think God hates me, but understand now his love is unconditional.
About five years ago I had my first ever dream about an angel. I was in my office back in Michigan, surrounded by what I called the "Office Christians". Standing at my desk was "Gabriel", the Archangel. White outfit, white wings, seven feet tall, the whole nine yards, so to speak. We talked for quite awhile, yet none of the "Office Christians" could see him, only me. Then he whispered things to me and told me they were secrets for me to know. What were they? Beats me, they were secrets. I still don't know.
So last night I was watching a PBS show about the Blitz in London, on December 29, 1940. It was very interesting, shocking, with interviews from several survivors and their haunting stories. At the end it was stated that 40,000 were killed, all that damage to London, etc. I suddenly asked God, why and how that could happen. The answer, whispered to my mind:
"The Cleansing"
About five years ago I had my first ever dream about an angel. I was in my office back in Michigan, surrounded by what I called the "Office Christians". Standing at my desk was "Gabriel", the Archangel. White outfit, white wings, seven feet tall, the whole nine yards, so to speak. We talked for quite awhile, yet none of the "Office Christians" could see him, only me. Then he whispered things to me and told me they were secrets for me to know. What were they? Beats me, they were secrets. I still don't know.
So last night I was watching a PBS show about the Blitz in London, on December 29, 1940. It was very interesting, shocking, with interviews from several survivors and their haunting stories. At the end it was stated that 40,000 were killed, all that damage to London, etc. I suddenly asked God, why and how that could happen. The answer, whispered to my mind:
"The Cleansing"
Friday, July 24, 2009
Here is a Thought
I'll admit it, sometimes I watch "The 700 Club" with Pat Robertson. They have good world news and insights. So watching today made me think of something I've never seen in PDX.
PDX is home to more "homeless" (bums, transients, dirt bag druggies), and a few actual homeless due to the recession, than any city in America! These people gather in groups, pan handle, and get high, most have pit bull dogs and dress in almost a costume. Sad, very sad...but to them it's a "lifestyle".
What I've never seen in PDX is Evangelical Christians going person to person trying to save them, and have them meet Jesus Christ. Perhaps this is done unseen by my eyes, but something makes me think it doesn't happen at all. There are over 400 non-profits here, more I am sure than even down-trodden Detroit, so that the thinking is "others are saving them". I also imagine that being saved is mostly rejected by these folks.
One feeling I have, is that the real hardcore street scum are the spawns of SATAN! Just a thought.
PDX is home to more "homeless" (bums, transients, dirt bag druggies), and a few actual homeless due to the recession, than any city in America! These people gather in groups, pan handle, and get high, most have pit bull dogs and dress in almost a costume. Sad, very sad...but to them it's a "lifestyle".
What I've never seen in PDX is Evangelical Christians going person to person trying to save them, and have them meet Jesus Christ. Perhaps this is done unseen by my eyes, but something makes me think it doesn't happen at all. There are over 400 non-profits here, more I am sure than even down-trodden Detroit, so that the thinking is "others are saving them". I also imagine that being saved is mostly rejected by these folks.
One feeling I have, is that the real hardcore street scum are the spawns of SATAN! Just a thought.
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
More Random Thoughts
A man can't get an erection in a fish market.
Who surrendered in the "War on Drugs"?
"DIY Plastic Surgery", now that is a niche market!
The rights of the many outweigh the rights of a few.
A bad decision is better than no decision.
Beer and Vodka are part of the FDA Food Pyramid!
Who surrendered in the "War on Drugs"?
"DIY Plastic Surgery", now that is a niche market!
The rights of the many outweigh the rights of a few.
A bad decision is better than no decision.
Beer and Vodka are part of the FDA Food Pyramid!
Sunday, July 19, 2009
"Memoirs of an Abused Toddler"
An acquaintance that I know, is visiting Mongolia for the summer as a paid volunteer...she pays to volunteer. She is a retired college professor and is writing her "memoirs", as is a mutual friend in my building. I have never thought of such a writing project, but if I did, mine would be titled "Memoirs of an Abused Toddler" or some such title.
I have already made a short video on "You-Tube" called "Black Obscurity" dedicated to my abusing and mostly evil mother.
I was an only child until I was three years old, then my sister was born. I have zero fond memories of my preschool years. When my mother got tired of my toddle boy antics, she locked me in the empty attic or rat infested basement for hours! That I remember. She killed my pets and called the deaths "accidents". I doubt that I'll be writing about all that, because then I'll have to include the UFO incident of 1967 and 1971...I don't want to go there!
I have already made a short video on "You-Tube" called "Black Obscurity" dedicated to my abusing and mostly evil mother.
I was an only child until I was three years old, then my sister was born. I have zero fond memories of my preschool years. When my mother got tired of my toddle boy antics, she locked me in the empty attic or rat infested basement for hours! That I remember. She killed my pets and called the deaths "accidents". I doubt that I'll be writing about all that, because then I'll have to include the UFO incident of 1967 and 1971...I don't want to go there!
Friday, July 17, 2009
Random Thoughts
Here are few random thoughts of the day, and yes, I am sitting:
Old people smell...they smell of piss, decay, B.O., mildew, and generally rank!
Liberals are insane...they have no values, moral compass, or ethics.
Many folks who use computers, should not!
What do volunteers think they are proving? Who could be that bored?
Bank robberies, murders, muggings, shootings, home invasions, and fires happen more everyday, yet police claim crime is on the decrease! Uh huh!
Racism is alive and well, mostly among minorities!
Bailout banks, auto companies, real estate, etc. What about bailing out the "people"?
Is hypochondria a disease?
Powered wheelchairs and scooters are a huge scam!
Is happiness merely the absence of sadness?
Old people smell...they smell of piss, decay, B.O., mildew, and generally rank!
Liberals are insane...they have no values, moral compass, or ethics.
Many folks who use computers, should not!
What do volunteers think they are proving? Who could be that bored?
Bank robberies, murders, muggings, shootings, home invasions, and fires happen more everyday, yet police claim crime is on the decrease! Uh huh!
Racism is alive and well, mostly among minorities!
Bailout banks, auto companies, real estate, etc. What about bailing out the "people"?
Is hypochondria a disease?
Powered wheelchairs and scooters are a huge scam!
Is happiness merely the absence of sadness?
Monday, July 13, 2009
July 2009.....I'm Still Here
July 2009.......still trapped in PDX, the most boring, diverse, dirty, and rude city I have ever lived in! The news everyday has murders, house fires, home invasions, etc. It is worse than Detroit....yeah I've lived there, or rather in the Metro area!
Portland has no culture, too many people under 40 yrs old who think its still the 1970's and they are "hippies". More homeless than can fit in a major sports arena and 75% of which are not even from Oregon. They are "transients" on an adventure and too lazy to work, even if anyone would ever give them a job! Like Colorado, Oregon is the land of the $8 to $9 per hour jobs! Yet it is the most expensive state I've lived in and makes Colorado, another low wage state, look like a bargain!
In thirteen months, in October of 2010, I am so out of here!
Portland has no culture, too many people under 40 yrs old who think its still the 1970's and they are "hippies". More homeless than can fit in a major sports arena and 75% of which are not even from Oregon. They are "transients" on an adventure and too lazy to work, even if anyone would ever give them a job! Like Colorado, Oregon is the land of the $8 to $9 per hour jobs! Yet it is the most expensive state I've lived in and makes Colorado, another low wage state, look like a bargain!
In thirteen months, in October of 2010, I am so out of here!
Wednesday, July 08, 2009
Retirement Without Money....No Problem
I remember when I worked, before my forced retirement in 2005, all the stories about how much money one needed to have stashed away for retirement!
Yes, you need millions if you want that $750,000 home in a gated golf course community with a $5000 mortgage payment, a new BMW and a Lexus for that trophy wife. But you don't need that to "live" or survive.
As I blog this, it has been almost two years since I have had any money, income or assets. I'm not old enough for SS and my SSDI was denied twice. I had a "survival job for one year, working for $7.49/hr, but with %525 rent, utilities, food, and bills was worse off than with nothing!
As previous blogs mention, I was living on the street in two different states for six months, than five months in homeless shelters. It's not great eating in soup kitchens or living in a dorm with 95 other guys. I thought of it as "Camp".
But it is better than being a wage slave, not knowing if your soon to be laid off, to lose you home and car, and be responsible for feeding two kids and a wife who blames you for all that is wrong! Suicide is better than that, which is why more folks take that route!
Am I happy? My counselor probably will say no. But I am surviving, until that first SS check arrives in October 2010. Life has given me lemons and I made Margaritas!
Yes, you need millions if you want that $750,000 home in a gated golf course community with a $5000 mortgage payment, a new BMW and a Lexus for that trophy wife. But you don't need that to "live" or survive.
As I blog this, it has been almost two years since I have had any money, income or assets. I'm not old enough for SS and my SSDI was denied twice. I had a "survival job for one year, working for $7.49/hr, but with %525 rent, utilities, food, and bills was worse off than with nothing!
As previous blogs mention, I was living on the street in two different states for six months, than five months in homeless shelters. It's not great eating in soup kitchens or living in a dorm with 95 other guys. I thought of it as "Camp".
But it is better than being a wage slave, not knowing if your soon to be laid off, to lose you home and car, and be responsible for feeding two kids and a wife who blames you for all that is wrong! Suicide is better than that, which is why more folks take that route!
Am I happy? My counselor probably will say no. But I am surviving, until that first SS check arrives in October 2010. Life has given me lemons and I made Margaritas!
Monday, July 06, 2009
Universal Health Care, A Myth?
Universal Health Care is a topic of dissention by almost everyone. Do we need it? Do we want it? Can we afford trillion dollar plus costs? These questions arise daily, from the media talk shows, newspaper editorials, blogs and other venues of discussion.
To those of a conservative nature, the cost alone seems to erase all benefits. Many shout from time to time, that the billions of dollars spent on the Space program could better be spent on social programs like health care. The billions spent on war and defense could feed cloth and shelter everyone in America. While somewhat true, is a Utopia the goal of any nation? If everyone’s basic needs are taken care of, is there any reason to strive to better ones self? These are moral, ethical, and financial questions that are difficult to answer.
Aside from the extreme of “Logan’s Run”, that Sci-Fi movie of years ago when everyone turning 30 was killed to make room on the crowded Earth, I think limits on health care and expense past a certain age say 80 yrs old makes sense. Why do expensive care such as organ transplants, invasive surgeries, etc. on someone 80+ years old, only to prolong their existence a few years. That infinite care and expense could better serve a much younger individual, with productive years ahead.
Universal Health Care has no easy answers or solutions, perhaps the concept is a myth.
To those of a conservative nature, the cost alone seems to erase all benefits. Many shout from time to time, that the billions of dollars spent on the Space program could better be spent on social programs like health care. The billions spent on war and defense could feed cloth and shelter everyone in America. While somewhat true, is a Utopia the goal of any nation? If everyone’s basic needs are taken care of, is there any reason to strive to better ones self? These are moral, ethical, and financial questions that are difficult to answer.
Aside from the extreme of “Logan’s Run”, that Sci-Fi movie of years ago when everyone turning 30 was killed to make room on the crowded Earth, I think limits on health care and expense past a certain age say 80 yrs old makes sense. Why do expensive care such as organ transplants, invasive surgeries, etc. on someone 80+ years old, only to prolong their existence a few years. That infinite care and expense could better serve a much younger individual, with productive years ahead.
Universal Health Care has no easy answers or solutions, perhaps the concept is a myth.
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